Do you ever think about an old friend, and wonder what happened to them; where they are now? Do you wonder why you lost touch with them? I often do, and it usually comes down to the fact I didn’t try to keep them in my life. It’s one of those things I tend to beat myself up about.
It’s too easy to leave. Just ask the countless people I’ve left in my wake, as I blasted by them. To stay or go was never the question. I never slowed down long enough to realize anyone really cared about me. Oh, I knew it. I could feel it… but I pretended not to… played dumb, and kept telling myself it didn’t matter. Lying through my teeth; wanting something, but not sure what. it was
It took me way too long to realize what I was doing… the devastation I was leaving behind by resisting the temptation to let myself be loved by someone… anyone; the temptation to admit I loved someone… anyone.
Maybe it’s not too late to fix this… maybe… I’ve got time.