Posts Tagged Tell people you love them

Mom Broke My Heart Today

be still coverI talked to Mom today. She sounded so good, so happy, and that makes my heart sing. I love my mom as much as any man can love another person. She’s my mentor, my guide, and my light. I just sometimes wish I could be the man she hoped I would be.

Her husband, Ray Brown isn’t well. So many things going on with his poor old body I can’t begin to list them all. But they keep praying and believing for his healing, and I pray with them. He’s a good guy, Ray Brown is, and I should have shown him more respect and given him more love these past 25 years or so. But I’m not that good a guy sometimes.

As mom and I talked, while I walked, this morning she told me how much it meant to her that I’ve started calling Ray every now and then—just to talk. Then… she told me about a dream she had last night. She said she doesn’t dream that often, and when she does, her dreams are vague and disjointed. But she said this one was vivid and clear. She said she dreamed I was sitting across from Ray, me in a chair facing him in his chair, and I was just holding his hand and smiling at him. But here’s what broke my heart and left me crying off and on the rest of this day. Mom, trying her best not to cry, said, “There was nothing but love in your smile, Charlie. I can’t even describe it.”

I don’t deserve a dream like that. I just don’t.

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